Here’s a universal truth ... everyone lies. You lie, I lie, we all lie. The reasons, justifications and excuses for lying appear to be many and varied, with some considered “good” and valid while others are considered completely unacceptable ... until you look a little deeper and realise that the human propensity for lying comes from the same fundamental source ... yep ... you guessed it, the not good enough stuff ... again!
You say you lie to spare someone’s feelings, to not cause an upset or a row, to avoid conflict or confrontation, to keep the peace, to be perceived as nice, polite and appropriate ... and on and on and on. When you examine what’s going on under the surface you will see that one of the key reasons you avoid telling the truth is you don’t want to feel guilty, wrong, to blame, upset etc. You don’t want others to feel “bad” because if they feel “bad” as a result of you telling your truth you think you are to blame, and then you feel “bad”. All this because you don’t want to/know how to deal with a messy, emotionally charged reaction. This usually occurs because you are scared to confront your own feelings - to feel them and respond to them and let them go. So the lying continues and everyone knows.
This brings me to the biggest lie of all ... the lie about who you really are and what’s really possible for every human being. When you keep agreeing with the old story about how you are not really good enough yet (but you will be one day), you keep yourself stuck in the lying and withholding game. And the biggest lie of all is your idea that you are somehow flawed and not quite good enough yet ... but with enough work and effort, you could get better! Not true!
The truth about you (and every human being) is that you are already perfect. Perfectly you, perfectly capable of choosing what to think, how to feel and what to do every moment of every moment. Aware that in every moment, you have a choice. And one choice you could make is the choice to accept that you are OK the way you are. There’s nothing “wrong” with you that needs fixing and there are certainly different choices you could make about how you think and the meaning you give everything; about how you feel and how you respond to yourself and others. You have a choice about how you show up in the world every moment of every moment. And that’s the truth.
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"The truth you speak has no past and no future.
It is and that’s all it needs to be."
Richard Bach, Illusions
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