The Waiting Game

For the past few weeks, I have been waiting for some inspiration so I could write the May newsletter for you. And so far, I have come up dry. I have lots of ideas swarming around in my head and in my psyche and yet every time I sit down to write, nothing seems to click, nada, zilch and zip.

I have been thinking “I must get this newsletter out before May 31st, everyone is expecting it, I can’t miss a month, I have never missed a month, what will it say about me if I don’t get it out in time..” and blah, blah, blah. I would then tell myself “it’s ok, you’ll get inspired, you always have before, it will come” and I would calm down for a while. Then the whole cycle would start again. I realised that the more I engage in the “woulda-coulda-shoulda, someday-oneday-when” conversation, the more unsettled and anxious I feel and nothing gets done!

So this morning I stopped the conversation (and the anxiety) by choosing to embrace what was happening. I chose to let go of needing to write this newsletter by any particular time. By choosing what I was already experiencing, I let go of my self-imposed “have to’s” and decided that I am where I am, things are how they are and I am ok whether I do it or not. Whew! Such a relief.

As soon as I let go, I was inspired to write what I have been experiencing throughout this process! This always happens when I let go, energy flows and things clear up in the process of life itself without any “have-to” or “must-make-it-happen” energy from me.

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

"You do not need to leave your room...
Remain sitting at your table and listen.
Do not even listen, simply wait.
Do not even wait, be quiet, still and solitary.
The world will freely offer itself to you to be unmasked.
It has no choice.
It will roll in ecstasy at your feet."

Franz Kafka