27 March 2012

Stress Crash Miracles!

One moment's loss of focus, a few seconds of being distracted and the sound of metal on metal was deafening ... I had just pulled out of a parking space (in my Mum's car) and hit another car. It happened so fast it took my breath away. Luckily for all concerned no damage was done to any living thing but the cars were both a bit of a mess. I realised fairly quickly that this stress crash was a wake up call. Time to stop and really acknowledge (and feel!) how much stress I had been creating for myself over the past few months. I thought I was handling it all really well. I felt quite well physically and although I knew I was anxious, I kept telling myself to "let go ... and breathe ..." and it worked ... until the day I hit another car! No amount of letting go and breathing could unhappen what had now happened ...

The effects of the stress crash kept rolling on for the next few days ... I hurt my back clearing out the car so the tow truck could take it away, I stubbed my toes (hard) when running for the phone to tell my Mum I had totalled her car and then I left the house (to catch the bus) without my keys and for some hours retraced my steps anxiously looking for them!

I had booked in to see one of my counsellors a few weeks previously when I recognsied I was stuck in "worry mode". I was feeling anxious and distracted and nothing I did was making any real difference, so I was glad the first appointment was imminent.
When I arrived for my session the lifts weren't working properly and after much waiting and waiting I finally got there ... late. I was feeling frustrated and upset as I collapsed into the chair and proceeded to unload for about 3 minutes ... then I was given a fluffy pink halo to put on my head as my counsellor said ... "Lighten up! It doesn't matter ... stop taking it all so seriously." I burst out laughing and we were on our way.

At the end of the session I felt different ... more present, in my body and able to breathe and be, rather than stuck in my mind. I shared that I was aware of being more spacious and my counsellor asked me to notice what was different over the next week, rather than focussing on all the stuff that wasn't. The last thing my counsellor said to me was: "Enjoy all the miracles, no matter how small they seem ... they are everywhere ..."

We walked out to the foyer, I pressed the lift button and the lift door opened immediately ... then we both started laughing.

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"When you realise how perfect everything is
you will tilt your head back and laugh at the sky."

Buddha